Sunday, January 08, 2006

My New Year's Gift To You: A Rambling, Incoherent Post! Oh, And A Picture Of A Pumpkin With Syphilis!

It has been awhile since I've written and I feel bad about it, you know, disappointing the three of you out there reading. Oh wait I forgot my mom doesn't have a computer. This post is for the two of you.

Before plunging into the New Year and all the excitement of our vacation (that we are still on. We will be missing the first day of school tomorrow. Don't tell the authorities.) I must do the obligatory Christmas wrap up!!

The holidays were awesome, in spite of the following:
1) Lost internet and cable TV for five straight days. ADELPHIA SUCKS.
2) Got screamed at by a senile, 500-year old neighbor
3) Accidentally invited my gynecologist to our holiday cocktail party

But first the awesomeness!!

This was my favorite day. It was the first weekend after the madness and we mustered up the balls to say 'NO' to any plan that required us to be anywhere at a specific time. This day we stayed in our pajamas most of the day, and then baked cookies for around three hours while we played Christmas carols and Rigel finished putting up lights. It felt like a scene straight out of "It's A Wonderful Life" except without all the sad parts.

We baked up these beauties.

Unfortunately the girls thought they were too pretty to eat, so they are still sitting on our kitchen counter. We haven't been home for a week, so I'm a little afraid of what they look like now. Here's what happened the last time we forgot to take care of Organic Foodstuffs Decorated In Celebration Of A Holiday:

Further confirmation of my poor housekeeping skills! Although, in my defense this tragedy was covered up by a construction paper antler hat that Kiyomi had worn in the school holiday show, so it wasn't like I just was ignoring this putrid pile of rotting squash sitting on the shelf in my children's bedroom. The girls screamed when they saw it, and then I came running in and screamed, too, and then we all made gagging noises while Rigel picked it up with his bare hands and threw it away.

To get your mind off that disturbing image, feast your eyes on this present I bought myself:

I have been wanting one of these for years and now I feel like a new woman. Rigel says he is worried that I'm using words like 'lust' and 'love' when referring to a cooking vessel but I've seen the way he looks at that guitar of his.

I was going to get into the stories about my encounter with the shriveled, feral neighbor and my mistaken invitation to my OB/GYN but that is just too much excitement and intrigue for just one post. I'll save it for when I get back from our trip, when I will upload some fascinating pictures of us eating breakfast in our hotel and sitting with pigeons Union Square. I'M HERE TO BLOW YOUR MINDS, PEOPLE.

Pin It


  1. The lime green Le Creuset says "Come on Baby, make Coq au vin in me"

    And I certianly hope that you called all of that pumpkins partners to inform them of it's "condition" - it's only right, you know...

  2. Those cookies are too pretty to eat.

    I hope your trip was fantastic. Last I checked, your house was still standing.

  3. Didn't I see that pumkin on Fox..something like 'When Good Pumpkims Go Bad'?

    Oh, and I make commenter number there is at least three readers!

  4. Pumpkin. There. I spelled it right at least once.

  5. I really just checked in to see if you would actually find time to add to this blog while still on YoUr VaCaTiOn (!!!!!!) --- my Gawd!!! You did !!!!

    Who's watching the girls!!! (we know he's asleep on the couch)

    you must be insane!!! -- or possibly we now have evidence of that long and almost forgotten illicit carnnubile transgretion you 've so cleverly tried to coverup these past few months, with... oh I dont know... pehaps a certain orange and green rolly polly fellow with bad skin.

    And you stand there as your loving husband, father of your beautiful children, is humiliated and forced to clean up yet another of your vile messes... the gall!!!!!!!

    Boy oh boy I'd like to be there when you try to explain this situation to the girls!!!! Oh wait... you won't have to ... cause your CraZy!!!!!!

    And to think you're the reining Queen of the PTA!!!!

    nice cookies marsha!!

  6. lllllooovee your yellow Le Creuset, so homy. Glad you hate Adelphia, which by the way, sucks golfballs thru garden shoses as a cable provider but it's the best AND cheapest form of therapy. Whenever you feel stressed and need to yell and verbally abuse somebody, just call Adelphia Customer Service and yell at them! They're used to anyway...and the funny thing is, the more you yell the more they keep transfering you to more and more competent people with soothing voices. Try It!

  7. For a minute there I thought that first sentence read, "lllllooovee your yellow Le Creuset, so horny"

    Which made me think I wasn't the only one with an unnatural love for a piece of kitchen equipment.


Related Posts with Thumbnails