Saturday, December 09, 2006

This Is Where I Talk About My Refrigerator And Then Provide Links To Distract You.

It's been a plodding week over here. First Kira got sick, then I thought I was getting sick, then Rigel got sick, then I thought I was getting sick again then we woke up Friday morning to a huge puddle of water underneath our refrigerator. Never say I don't know how to have fun.

The repairman showed up to look at our refrigerator and told us it would cost $450 to fix. Seeing as we had just spent $400 on it a little over a year ago to fix a similar problem, we started discussing whether or not it was worth it to fix a twelve-year old appliance. This seemed to cause our repairman great distress, all this tossing around of big words like "money" and "fix" and "old" because he started sighing loudly, rolling his eyes and checking his cell phone. Finally he said, "While YOU TWO are TRYING to decide I'm going to go outside and smoke." Charming fellow!

Apparently he called his office to complain about us indecisive yuppie scum, because immediately the phone rang and when I answered it his supervisor launched into a whole sales pitch, trying to convince me that buying a new refrigerator would be a mistake, and we should fix our old one and he knew that if I went to the store I would (and I quote here) "buy a refrigerator with a TV in it, and in a few years that TV that you thought was so great would end up speaking French to you." I told him that his talents were obviously being wasted in appliance repair, that where he really belonged was as an ambassador to NATO.

But what really sealed the deal for me was this exchange that followed:

Me: Thank you, but we've really made up our mind not to fix it. We'll be buying a new –

Ambassador To Nato: Excuse me! Let me explain! I don't think you understand - your refrigerator is perfectly fine. The new ones are not made as well. You should let us fix your old one.

Me: Yes, I do understand but we've decided to –

Ambassador To Nato: Let me explain! Or, maybe you don't understand. Maybe I need to talk to your husband.

WWMD? (What Would Mom-101 Do?) Liz, I could have used a good feminist zinger to put this chauvinistic, appliance-fixing, French-TV-hating jerk in his place.

The upside of the whole ordeal is that I now have this beauty humming away in my kitchen.

Unfortunately, I had to cancel plans to have coffee with one of my favorite bloggers.


Some more links to distract you from the fact that this entire post consisted almost entirely of my conversation with an expert on refrigerator repair:

If you haven't already read this, go read it now. KC of Where's My Cape writes beautifully about growing up with racism and ethnic stereotypes.

Check out MetroDad's mailbag, where he gives advice on a variety of topics, including hiring a nanny: "During the interview, have your wife dial her cell phone and check her ring tone. If it plays "My Humps" or the theme song to "Scarface," don't hire her. There's a good chance your potential hiree is a wanna-be gangsta or an undercover skank."

I'm not even remotely crafty but I'm inexplicably intrigued by this project over at Wisdom Has Two Parts. It must have been the cheapskate in me picking up on the part where she mentions getting something for a quarter.


The best part of my week? I went to a great concert on Friday night.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

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  1. what was your concert?

    damn, you didn't get a fridge with a t.v. in the door?

  2. But... where's the tv????

    When the sales guy told you he might have to talk to your husband - that would have been when I HUNG UP ON HIM and kicked his repair man out of my house.

    ... all while my husband stood back and watched and smirked.

  3. OhLawd. That confirms my long held suspicion, that appliance repairman REALLY are the devil. Oy. Love the new 'frig. Beautiful.

  4. I'm glad I read your post, since we were getting ready to get our fridge serviced. I think I will skip the psycho repairmen and head straight to the appliance store. Tis the season!


  5. This is very weird. Over here the repairmen all work for the company and on being presented with a misbehaving appliance tyhey will immediately shake their head sigh and set about trying to sell you a new one (with an extended warranty).

  6. You're just going to leave us there? Hanging? Wondering about the anonymous concert? C'mom, Sister Sledge!

  7. Eek, and now that you've put me on the spot, I have absolutely nothing witty to say whatsoever. This is why I'd fail miserably at standup. I'm only good on the rewrite.

    Okay...I'd probably have said something really wide-eyed with a huge smile about how my husband was currently in France visiting his family.

  8. What a lovely new fridge! And why is it that major appliance problems always occur during the holidays? Arrrghh!

    I think I would have been tempted to respond to the Ambassador to NATO guy, "You want to speak to my husband? Why she's right here!" Or something like that. What a tool, no pun intended.

  9. I would have been so angry at someone saying they should talk to my husband I would've asked him to repeat his request and then said "yeah I thought you would be dumb enough to repeat that. Just wanted to check" and ended the conversation with me getting his name, his boss' name and the owner of the company's name and quickly throwing the repair dude out of the house. Grrr does that shit piss me off.

    Also? Oooh pretty fridge.

  10. Nice fridge. What an ass. Both the repairman and his boss. You handled it much better than I would have.

  11. Beautiful new addition to the family! Screw the sexist pig! Jeeezzz...

  12. "The new ones are not made as well"

    And this guy is wasting his potential fixing major kitchen appliances?

    Honored to be a link. Thanks.

  13. Fridge looks fin, bet it can hold lots of alcohol. Sorry, I mean food.

    What I really want to know is if your fridge has already started speaking French to you?


  14. Hey! We have the same refrigerator (or as we like to call it, "the magic Diet Coke machine.")

  15. Yummy fridge. Did the fancy cake and all that fresh produce come with it?

  16. What a jerk. I keep wondering how people like that stay in business.

    And Mom-101 totally stole my reply (well, sort of-- I would have said "But my husband doesn't speak English nearly as well as he speaks his native French." Except the dude had probably already heard your husband talk enough to know that he spoke English perfectly well. But it's what I would have WANTED to say). But clearly, WWMD needs to be my new motto . . .

  17. oooooo...pretty! And it keeps stuff cold, too! So happy it was all resolved so quickly and while replacing a fridge just before Xmas is not good, at least you won't be seeing that telltale puddle on Christmas Eve!

  18. How come I never have dumb-ass repairmen say dumb-ass things to me so that I can blog it?

    Probably because I could never do it as funny as you do.

    Congratulations on the new fridge--you definitely made the right decision. And thanks for the link. I hope you try making the books--they are way easier than the instructions make them look. Then you can post pictures of your success for us!

  19. WWMD? I love that. I want your fridge. Maybe I should poor water under mine and tell hubby it's broken.

    I can't believe that guy tried to get you to fix it. Loser.

  20. I have that fridge and love it! Sounds like they were major scammers..
    Mary, mom to many

  21. Ok, I understand your Refridgerator Repairmen situation sucked, however I believe I may have topped it. K was out of town, our fridge quit, I called the repairman. Come to find out the switch has to be "on" in order for it to work. I actually played the role of the helpless female quite well, needless to say my repairman's eye-rolls were completely justified.

  22. a) a new fridge = right call. i did hear that a posh fridge is one of the only items it's wise to get a warrantee on (but that could have been a scam to make me, uh, buy one...)
    b) your tags. they are breathtaking. and thorough.

  23. "...that TV that you thought was so great would end up speaking French to you."

    I would love that because I'm trying to learn French! Would it teach me piano, too? Cuz I'm having about as much luck at that as at French.

  24. What a crack up, I would have loved to see how you disposed of the repairman's body. :)

  25. I think I like the "high fashion look" created by your refrigerator doors...

  26. Just found your blog. I thought your post was hilarious and here you were acting as though it was less than stellar. Can't wait to read some of the older posts.

    Very pretty fridge! Merry Christmas to you!

  27. Concert? What concert? Do tell...

  28. When I read of your plight, three words jumped to my lips: "Oh my God!" As one who also recently had a run-in with a sketchy fridge repairman, I know, Sister Sweatpants. I know.

  29. I hate rapairmen, and wish I could always find something witty and intelligent to say to them when they make me feel 2 inches tall!!! But then, they probably wouldn't get it anyway.

    Love the new fridge, and the icy cold water dispenser!


  30. Pretty, pretty fridge! Am so happy for you and envious too!

  31. Good call! You should list that repairmans phone number- we should all give him a call!

  32. Oh, he should have known the minute he uttered 'Maybe I need to talk to your husband.' that he was ohhhh so done.
    Good for you! Nothin' like a new fridge for Christmas, as long as it is stocked w/good wine and chocolate :)

  33. I apologize that this is off-topic, however it is of paramount importance so please bear with me.

    One thing that struck me as odd in the days after 9/11 was Bush saying "We will not tolerate conspiracy theories [regarding 9/11]". Sure enough there have been some wacky conspiracy theories surrounding the events of that day. The most far-fetched and patently ridiculous one that I've ever heard goes like this: Nineteen hijackers who claimed to be devout Muslims but yet were so un-Muslim as to be getting drunk all the time, doing cocaine and frequenting strip clubs decided to hijack four airliners and fly them into buildings in the northeastern U.S., the area of the country that is the most thick with fighter bases. After leaving a Koran on a barstool at a strip bar after getting shitfaced drunk on the night before, then writing a suicide note/inspirational letter that sounded like it was written by someone with next to no knowledge of Islam, they went to bed and got up the next morning hung over and carried out their devious plan. Nevermind the fact that of the four "pilots" among them there was not a one that could handle a Cessna or a Piper Cub let alone fly a jumbo jet, and the one assigned the most difficult task of all, Hani Hanjour, was so laughably incompetent that he was the worst fake "pilot" of the bunch, with someone who was there when he was attempting to fly a small airplane saying that Hanjour was so clumsy that he was unsure if he had driven a car before. Nevermind the fact that they received very rudimentary flight training at Pensacola Naval Air Station, making them more likely to have been C.I.A. assets than Islamic fundamentalist terrorists. So on to the airports after Mohammed Atta supposedly leaves two rental cars at two impossibly far-removed locations. So they hijack all four airliners and at this time passengers on United 93 start making a bunch of cell phone calls from 35,000 feet in the air to tell people what was going on. Nevermind the fact that cell phones wouldn't work very well above 4,000 feet, and wouldn't work at ALL above 8,000 feet. But the conspiracy theorists won't let that fact get in the way of a good fantasy. That is one of the little things you "aren't supposed to think about". Nevermind that one of the callers called his mom and said his first and last name ("Hi mom, this is Mark Bingham"), more like he was reading from a list than calling his own mom. Anyway, when these airliners each deviated from their flight plan and didn't respond to ground control, NORAD would any other time have followed standard operating procedure (and did NOT have to be told by F.A.A. that there were hijackings because they were watching the same events unfold on their own radar) which means fighter jets would be scrambled from the nearest base where they were available on standby within a few minutes, just like every other time when airliners stray off course. But of course on 9/11 this didn't happen, not even close. Somehow these "hijackers" must have used magical powers to cause NORAD to stand down, as ridiculous as this sounds because total inaction from the most high-tech and professional Air Force in the world would be necessary to carry out their tasks. So on the most important day in its history the Air Force was totally worthless. Then they had to make one of the airliners look like a smaller plane, because unknown to them the Naudet brothers had a videocamera to capture the only known footage of the North Tower crash, and this footage shows something that doesn't look like a jumbo jet, but didn't have to bother with the South Tower jet disguising itself because that was the one we were "supposed to see". Anyway, as for the Pentagon they had to have Hani Hanjour fly his airliner like it was a fighter plane, making a high G-force corkscrew turn that no real airliner can do, in making its descent to strike the Pentagon. But these "hijackers" wanted to make sure Rumsfeld survived so they went out of their way to hit the farthest point in the building from where Rumsfeld and the top brass are located. And this worked out rather well for the military personnel in the Pentagon, since the side that was hit was the part that was under renovation at the time with few military personnel present compared to construction workers. Still more fortuitous for the Pentagon, the side that was hit had just before 9/11 been structurally reinforced to prevent a large fire there from spreading elsewhere in the building. Awful nice of them to pick that part to hit, huh? Then the airliner vaporized itself into nothing but tiny unidentifiable pieces most no bigger than a fist, unlike the crash of a real airliner when you will be able to see at least some identifiable parts, like crumpled wings, broken tail section etc. Why, Hani Hanjour the terrible pilot flew that airliner so good that even though he hit the Pentagon on the ground floor the engines didn't even drag the ground!! Imagine that!! Though the airliner vaporized itself on impact it only made a tiny 16 foot hole in the building. Amazing. Meanwhile, though the planes hitting the Twin Towers caused fires small enough for the firefighters to be heard on their radios saying "We just need 2 hoses and we can knock this fire down" attesting to the small size of it, somehow they must have used magical powers from beyond the grave to make this morph into a raging inferno capable of making the steel on all forty-seven main support columns (not to mention the over 100 smaller support columns) soften and buckle, then all fail at once. Hmmm. Then still more magic was used to make the building totally defy physics as well as common sense in having the uppermost floors pass through the remainder of the building as quickly, meaning as effortlessly, as falling through air, a feat that without magic could only be done with explosives. Then exactly 30 minutes later the North Tower collapses in precisely the same freefall physics-defying manner. Incredible. Not to mention the fact that both collapsed at a uniform rate too, not slowing down, which also defies physics because as the uppermost floors crash into and through each successive floor beneath them they would shed more and more energy each time, thus slowing itself down. Common sense tells you this is not possible without either the hijackers' magical powers or explosives. To emphasize their telekinetic prowess, later in the day they made a third building, WTC # 7, collapse also at freefall rate though no plane or any major debris hit it. Amazing guys these magical hijackers. But we know it had to be "Muslim hijackers" the conspiracy theorist will tell you because (now don't laugh) one of their passports was "found" a couple days later near Ground Zero, miraculously "surviving" the fire that we were told incinerated planes, passengers and black boxes, and also "survived" the collapse of the building it was in. When common sense tells you if that were true then they should start making buildings and airliners out of heavy paper and plastic so as to be "indestructable" like that magic passport. The hijackers even used their magical powers to bring at least seven of their number back to life, to appear at american embassies outraged at being blamed for 9/11!! BBC reported on that and it is still online. Nevertheless, they also used magical powers to make the american government look like it was covering something up in the aftermath of this, what with the hasty removal of the steel debris and having it driven to ports in trucks with GPS locators on them, to be shipped overseas to China and India to be melted down. When common sense again tells you that this is paradoxical in that if the steel was so unimportant that they didn't bother saving some for analysis but so important as to require GPS locators on the trucks with one driver losing his job because he stopped to get lunch. Hmmmm. Further making themselves look guilty, the Bush administration steadfastly refused for over a year to allow a commission to investigate 9/11 to even be formed, only agreeing to it on the conditions that they get to dictate its scope, meaning it was based on the false pretense of the "official story" being true with no other alternatives allowed to be considered, handpicked all its members making sure the ones picked had vested interests in the truth remaining buried, and with Bush and Cheney only "testifying" together, only for an hour, behind closed doors, with their attorneys present and with their "testimonies" not being recorded by tape or even written down in notes. Yes, this whole story smacks of the utmost idiocy and fantastic far-fetched lying, but it is amazingly enough what some people believe. Even now, five years later, the provably false fairy tale of the "nineteen hijackers" is heard repeated again and again, and is accepted without question by so many Americans. Which is itself a testament to the innate psychological cowardice of the American sheeple, i mean people, and their abject willingness to believe something, ANYTHING, no matter how ridiculous in order to avoid facing a scary uncomfortable truth. Time to wake up America.

    Debunking Popular Mechanics lies:
    someone else debunking Popular Mechanics crap:
    still more debunking Popular Mechanics:
    and still more debunking of Popular Mechanics:

    Popular Mechanics staff replaced just before laughable “debunking” article written:
    another neo-con 9/11 hit piece explodes, is retracted:
    Professor Steven Jones debunks the N.I.S.T. “report” as well as the F.E.M.A. one and the 9/11 commission "report":
    N.I.S.T. scientist interviewed:
    F.B.I. says no hard evidence linking Osama bin Laden to 9/11 which is why his wanted poster says nothing about 9/11:
    Fire Engineering magazine says important questions about the Twin Tower “collapses” still need to be addressed:

    Twin Towers’ construction certifiers say they should have easily withstood it:
    USA Today interview with the last man out of the South Tower, pursued by a fireball:
    Janitor who heard explosions and escaped has testimony ignored by 9/11 whitewash commission:
    Janitor starts speaking out about it and his apartment is burglarized, laptop stolen:
    Firefighters tell of multiple explosions:
    Eyewitnesses tell of explosions:
    Interview with another firefighter telling of explosions:
    Firefighter saw “sparkles” (strobe lights on detonators?) before “collapse”:
    Other eyewitnesses talk of seeing/hearing explosions:
    Surviving eyewitnesses talk of multiple explosions there:
    Cutter charge explosions clearly visible:
    The pyroclastic cloud (that dust cloud that a second before was concrete) and how it wouldn’t be possible without explosives:
    Detailed description of the demolition of the Twin Towers:
    Freefall rate of “collapses” math:
    More about their freefall rate “collapses”:
    Video footage of the controlled demolition of the Twin Towers:
    Video footage of the controlled demolition of WTC # 7 building:
    More of WTC # 7 controlled demolition:
    Naudet brothers' video footage of the North Tower crash:
    Photos of the Pentagon’s lawn (look at these and see if you can tell me with a straight face that a jumbo jet crashed there):!.htm
    More photos of this amazing lawn at the Pentagon:!%20(9-11).htm
    Very unconvincing fake “Osama” “confession” tape:
    More about the fake “Osama” tape:
    Fake “Mohammed Atta” “suicide” letter:
    Commercial pilots disagree with “official” 9/11 myth:
    More commercial jet pilots say “official” myth is impossible:
    Impossibility of cell phone calls from United 93:
    More about the impossible cell phone calls:
    Experiment proves cell phone calls were NOT possible from anywhere near the altitude the “official” myth has them at:
    Fake Barbara Olson phone call:
    Where the hell was the Air Force?
    More about the Air Force impotence question:
    Sept. 10th 2001, Pentagon announces it is “missing” $2.3 trillion (now why do you think they picked THAT day to announce it? So it could be buried the next day by 9/11 news):
    Unocal pipeline-through-Afghanistan plan:
    Unocal pipeline-through-Afghanistan plan mentioned:
    More on Unocal Afghan pipeline:
    The attack on Afghanistan was planned in the summer of 2001, months before 9/11:
    Pentagon deliberately misled 9/11 Commission:
    Evidence destruction by authorities and cover-up:
    9/11 whitewash Commission and NORAD day:
    The incredible fish tales of the 9/11 Commission examined:
    Jeb Bush declares state of emergency 4 days before 9/11 for Florida, saying it will help respond to terrorism:
    Steel debris removal from Ground Zero, destruction of evidence:
    Over two hundred incriminating bits of 9/11 evidence shown in the mainstream media:
    Tracking the “hijackers”:
    “Hijacker” patsies:
    “Hijackers” receiving flight training at Pensacola Naval Air Station:
    Several accused "hijackers" still alive and well, wondering why they are accused:
    Yet the F.B.I. insists that the people it claims were the "hijackers" really were the "hijackers":
    No Arabs on Flight 77:
    Thirty experts say “official” 9/11 myth impossible:
    “Al Qaeda” website tracks back to Maryland:
    Al Qaeda videos uploaded from U.S. government website:
    Operation: Northwoods, a plan for a false-flag “terror” attack to be blamed on Castro to use it as a pretext for America to invade Cuba, thankfully not approved by Kennedy back in 1962 but was approved by the Joint Chiefs of Staff and sent to his desk:


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