Signs Your 9-Year-Old May Be Watching Too Many "Fresh Prince of Bel Air" Reruns or Secretly Listening to Your Rap Collection, Or Both.

Walking into the kitchen: "Whassup, my pimpin' homey mama?"

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Back From Vacay: I'm Not Dead, But I Sure Look Like I Am.

It's been a long time, over a month, since I last posted. That's the longest I've been away from this blog, and thanks to all of you who asked where I was and if I was okay. I'm fine, with the exception of being incredibly exhausted from the girls being off of school, hosting out-of-town guests for ten days straight, having some remodeling done on our bedroom, trashing celebrities and hosting a family party for thirty people. Oh, and two more of our fish died, but we've been too busy to have a ceremony like we did for the late, great Little Guppy. The girls seemed relieved, though when I told them I'd penciled in 'Fish Funeral' on my calendar for February 2009.

I haven't visited a single blog in the last month, either, and believe me when I say it's only because I had to make the difficult decision to read blogs or actually get a few minutes of sleep . I'm looking forward to catching up on everyone's lives - I'm sure many of you have moved, had babies, won Pulitzer Prizes, changed careers and switched detergents. I've only done the last one but, boy - it's made a hell of a difference in my mood and I smell like a freakin' mountain spring.

The other thing that happened since I last posted is that Kiyomi turned nine and we bought her an iPod for her birthday. If you can remember from last year, we agonized for awhile over buying Kira one for her tenth birthday - Is it too much? Are we spoiling her? What a difference twelve months makes, as we no longer have any qualms whatsoever about buying our children expensive, possibly inappropriate electronic gifts. In fact, Christmas is coming and both of them are getting wall-sized plasma TVs that will come wrapped in fully loaded Lamborghinis.

Part of the reason for our caving is the ease of buying one simple gift that they've requested. I'm more than happy to leave behind the days when I'd spend five hours in the Polly Pocket aisle looking for just the right combination of doll, rubber accessories and plastic housing. What could be simpler than making one call to Rigel and asking him to stop by the Apple store on his way home from work? Plus, he's so happy to have an excuse to visit one of his favorite places that he even offered to bring home dinner. I'm telling you ladies, iPods may be the best invention for busy mothers since SpongeBob marathons.

Not surprisingly, we've been too preoccupied to have a birthday party for her, so last night I asked her if she had any idea what she'd like. She informed me that she already had an idea for the type of 'event' (and she used that word, event) she wanted. She whipped out a pad and pencil and fifteen minutes later came back to me with her idea written out - a Carnival Party, complete with game booths, face painting, tattoos, a prize station, snack stand and water games. Nothing elaborate, six to seven-thousand-dollars tops and we're probably talking about only a fifteen-hour time span. I didn't have the heart to crush her idea right then, but I'm hoping she won't be disappointed when she finds out it'll be more like pizzas and juice boxes, water balloons, goody bags from the dollar store and me drawing on everyone's face with a Sharpie. It'll be loads of fun - she'll see.

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In some other old, outdated news, my interview with Hayden Panettiere was published in the June/July issue of Genlux magazine. If you're looking for some good bathroom reading, you can drag your laptop into the restroom and read it here and here. Don't forget to flush.








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tags: blog vacation | i heart ipods | hayden panettiere

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