Monday, March 26, 2007

Yes, That's What I Keep Trying To Tell Your Father.

It's become enormously entertaining to watch television with our girls these days, especially shows that depict any kind of romantic interaction. They'll be contently engrossed in a show, their eyes glazed over and their lips wrapped around a juice box when the appearance of a romantic interlude will send them into a frenzy. They start by hissing when the hand holding begins and then grow more agitated as the on-screen couple start gazing into each other's eyes. By the time the kissing starts the girls are practically convulsing and by the sounds of their gagging you would think I was forcing them to smell my armpits.

I was watching one of these shows the other day with them, something on the Disney channel that had the usual plot - boy meets girl, girl hates boy, boy redeems himself by revealing he is a misunderstood alien - and started bracing myself for the hysterics that would greet the final romantic scene. Kira had her pillow ready, prepared to cover her eyes and Kiyomi started in with an animated play by play:

"Oh, God! They're getting closer"

"No! Stop! They're starting to kiss!"

"Oh no! Oh no! SMILING MAKE OUT! SMILING MAKE OUT!"

Curious, I asked her if "smiling make out" was worse than plain old, run-of-the-mill make out.

"Oh God, OF COURSE IT IS. If they're going to make out they shouldn't look like they're enjoying it."

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

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31 comments:

  1. oh, no. i know i'll like this stage than the one that comes next...smiling make out - eeeww.

    if only it could stay that way till they are 23.

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  2. Too funny. I have to remember to look absolutely unhappy the next time I kiss my husband in front of the kids.

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  3. Hah I remember that stage so vividly! My husband and I have vowed that when our kids are teenagers and get all embarrassed about actually knowing us we will be sure to hold hands lots and be all kissey-kissey. (come to think of it we'll just do what we've always done)

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  4. Antique Mommy3/27/2007 4:51 AM

    I thought that was something you learned only after marriage.

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  5. Smiling Making Out. I like that!

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  6. Yep! Absolutely! Until last year, Coffeekid would actually SHIELD HIS EYES and make gagging noises. That was at 13. LOL.

    My 11 year old still does.

    I remember all three kids at some point making the comments: "Why do they have to ruin a good show with KISSING!?"

    (And yet... if you believe the media they'll have you blieve all 12 year olds are having sex already and that it is Ok as long as they are using protection). Yeah right! Normal 12 year olds are still GAGGING at the thought of kissing!

    LOL.

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  7. I miss the days when kids said "grody" -- that would fit right in here!

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  8. I'm so not looking forward to THIS stage at all with my 3.5 kids. Or actually we'll be watching "Animal Planet" until they're 18. Oh scratch that, animals do mate don't they?

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  9. Would be nice if they kept that theory into their late teens?

    Your girls are too funny.

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  10. I still feel that way about watching other people kiss. Eeewww, gross!

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  11. Enjoy this stage of their lives....it'll change before you know it.

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  12. hilarious. . .do you think they'll remember this when they start dating?

    or will this reaction be a distant memory?

    not that they'll be dating any time soon -- i'm sure that your girls will know that they shouldn't start dating until they are 30. at least.

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  13. Everyone in my house covers their eyes (4 to 55), we even cover the dog's eyes.

    Want to make them cover their ears? Say sperm.

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  14. I think I might have arrested development as a tweenager, because this is pretty much how I act too. GER-ROSS. (especially if there are noises).

    My husband is one lucky man, as I am so deeply sexual.

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  15. "smiling make out."

    I think you've got a comedy writer on your hands.

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  16. This is GREAT!

    Ben (my nine-year-old) refers to the crushes girls in his class profess to have as "fake love."

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  17. I just noticed your tags for this post are love! romance! nausea!

    Ha! ;)

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  18. okay, when i see people smiling while making out, it creeps me out too! dude, your kissing the teeth and that is so strange and then, i feel uncomfortable, because they obviously are uncomfortable and then i have to close my eyes.

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  19. you have taught them well, dear sweatpants.
    x

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  20. Let's hope they stay this way forever!

    Carrie

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  21. I am sending my daughter to your house to be schooled by your two.

    "If they're going to make out they shouldn't look like they're enjoying it." That is what my good Irish Catholic- Vatican 1-grandmother always said....

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  22. If only this phase lasted FOREVER...

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  23. Oh how I wish we were still in that phase. My oldest is crushing hard on a girl, now he has no idea what he would do with a girl, but he's intrigued with the idea of getting her to be his girlfriend and then completing ignoring her.

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  24. This phase is second only to kicking the boy in the shins that you have a crush on and then running away as if your life depended on it. I still do that to my husband.

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  25. Yeah, that smiling making out is the worst. I always try to just think of England, which never works because I always end up thinking of Benny Hill and then I accidently end up doing the laughing making out.

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  26. That is too funny! I must have been a messed up kid- I always like dthat part of movies when I was younger...lol...

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  27. hahhahha. If you could just get them to keep thinking that until they were 25 you would be on to something. too funny.

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  28. Sounds like life in the Nomad household as well. For Elliot's 10th bday, we had a thousand or so boys spending the night and staying up ALL NIGHT LONG WATCHING ALL 3 LOTR MOVIES IN A ROW. Sorry for the caps; it's how I feel. They were all very funny at the kissing scenes. My husband would hit "pause" just as lips locked, and the boys would groan, and writhe in pain, and hide their eyes, and fake vomit, and my husband would zoom in on the lips. Try this next time.

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  29. oh this is funny!

    I also enjoyed the LOTR post you linked me too...at least you know there is one other person out there who has not seen the hobbit/wizard play by play

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  30. Awesome. Heh.

    Mimi has a boyfriend at school (she says she's going to marry him), so once when I asked if he'd kissed her -- just hoping he hadn't crossed that line -- she looked horrified.

    "Oh NO!" she replied.

    That's my girl!!!

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